Sunday, October 31, 2010

So...

How did it go, kids?

Did you resist the lure of sugar, chocolate, bright colours and calories?

I did. :) I treated myself to a sugar free dark chocolate Jello pudding cup. It was rich, chocolate-y and made me happy. 60 calories and no sugar.

It is after seven and we haven't had any little costumed menaces ring our doorbell and I doubt any will. I think that Husband and Son will be enjoying fun sized packs of Skittles.

Anything else going on?

Not really. :P

Happy Hallowe'en!

BOO!!






Just say no to candy

It is a chilly morning and I finally dragged my arse out of the sack, made coffee and fired up my fireplace. I lay in that bed, shivering for far too long. I could have been up and warm long before this. I also don't need to shiver, if I would haul out my quilt, run it through the wash and put it on my bed. Duh! 

No plans for today. Just to stay on track. I imagine it will be a quiet day. Son has to work and Husband is in lie on the sofa and veg mode, this weekend. We have stuff stashed on the DVR that we need to watch and clear from the memory. Woooopie!!!!!! Too much excitement for this girl. *sarcasm*

Okay, I need another cup of coffee. Then I want to cruise my blogroll and see what you are all up to, this fine morning. 

:D 

Saturday, October 30, 2010

An Orange Stalker

My cat did indeed attach himself to me, tonight. I baked some fish for my dinner and Marley was soooo happy. And excited. He devoured every bit I decided to share with him. And came around, looking for more.

I decided to make butternut squash fries to go with dinner, tonight. Okay, I have never, in my born days worked with butternut squash, before. Dayum! That shit is hard as a rock. I actually had to use a kitchen towel on top of my knife blade to protect my hand from the back of the blade as I pushed it through the squash. It took a lot of time to halve, cut the ends off of, seed, cut into eighths, peel and cut into strips that squash. But, after tossing them in some Pam and seasoned salt, laying them out on their foil lined and sprayed cookie sheets and baking them off, the work was worth it. Yum! So tasty. I made the fries too thin and they had to be eaten with a fork, but I don't care, they still tasted wonderful. Next time I will cut them thicker. :D

Husband and Son had Icky Willy Chili with macaroni for dinner. *shudders* I don't know how they can eat that shit. Seriously, it is bad. Really bad. Want the recipe? Just brown hamburger with some diced onion. Then add a can of tomato soup (condensed, no water) and a can of kidney beans with the slimy, gooey, barf inducing juice into the pot and stir it all up. You can add some chili powder to turn it into "real" chili. Simmer for a while and chow down.

*gag*

Oh! Allen wanted to know just how cold it could get in Arizona. Actually, Allen, Arizona has a lot of different climates. It isn't all flat, low desert, sand, cacti and Gila monsters. I think that the impression that most people have of this state is that it is all like that. But it isn't. Arizona has varied topography and many climates ranging from low desert to high mountains. There is high desert, high valleys, foothills, mountains and magnificent tall pine forest. Elevations range from below sea level to over eight thousand feet. Climates and temperatures from mild to searing hot to bone freezing cold. We have endlessly sunny days and snow. Killer humidity and winds so cold that they will freeze a bucket or bowl of water left outside solid in less than an hour. Prescott, in north central Arizona is in forested foothill country. We sit at 5000 feet, our climate is pretty much temperate, tho we have more than the average of sunny days. We get spectacular thunderstorms in the Summer (we call them Monsoons) and in the Winter, snow is a frequent visitor to the area. Temps can drop into the teens, even single digits, during cold snaps at night. But it usually warms up a little during the day. Snow can get deep but melts away swiftly. In the Summer, 90s is normal, tho we get into the hundreds, too.

My biggest gripe with this state is the unrelenting sunshine. We see blue sky, sunshine every day. A 24 hour period without at least some blue sky/sunshine is rare. And I love dark, grey, windy days filled with rain and gloom. All this sunshine is fucking depressing. lol

Tomorrow is Hallowe'en.

Just say NO!!!! To candy!

Speaking of candy... Hubbs brought home a bag just in case we get any little costumed bandits ringing our doorbell. He bought fun sized Skittles. Made me think of Draz when I saw it. :D

Let's see... Food is really good, today. I am solidly on track. I should have, could have gone for a walk but I flaked. I'll have to get out there, tomorrow, provided I feel up to it.

Okay I guess that is all I have to babble about, tonight.

Whoooooosh!

The wind is blowing, today. The trees are swaying and the tall, dry grasses waving back and forth hypnotically. It is warm, in spite of the season and the wind blowing. The trees changing colour tell me that it is the day before Hallowe'en but the warm, sunny day tells me something else.

Yesterday was a good, solid day on track. I ended the day at 1500 and change and I am happy with that. I am ding well today, too. Maybe I am finally past my snotty, sulky, poor little me phase and ready to buckle down and get the job done, again.

I don't know what my problem was, exactly. Part boredom, part tired of it, part "Gee whiz,  have already lost a lot of weight and I should be able to do whatever the hell I want to do!" Include the foot stomp and I think you pretty much have my mental state for a while. Brat.

I suppose that I will have to work though feelings of frustration and grow accustomed to the fact that this is for real, for ever and I am going to have to accept it. At a deep level that apparently I haven't, quite yet. I mean, I get it... This is how I roll, now. But there is a part of me that is resistant, doesn't want to accept this and I think that part of me kicks up a fuss, from time to time and protests her inability to do as she is used to doing.

Bitch'll just have to get over it. lol

Hubby took the in-laws shopping today and I had some time to myself. Just me, the animals and the wind. And the TV.

Hmmm... What do I want for lunch? My husband is eating a ham sandwich and the cat is on the back of the sofa, lurking and stalking, hoping for a tidbit. He will be all over me, tonight. I am planning to have fish for dinner.

Friday, October 29, 2010

Is It Friday Already?

Hey guys. Howz things? I am just sitting here, thinking about having another cup of coffee and marveling at the fact that another week is gone, already. How soul sucking unfair is it that the older we get, the faster the time passes?

It is a chilly, sunny morning. I have stuff to get done and will get to it in a bit.

I was on track yesterday, and I am feeling good about today, too.

Okay, I don't really have all that much more to yap about at present so I am going to wrap this bore-fest up. See you all later. :D

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Everybody Loves a Freebie

I know that I do. Especially if that freebie might just help make getting my two quarts of water a day down my piehole a little more easy. Now, don't get me wrong, I don't mind water. But I like a little flavour even better. And I very much enjoy a hint of lemon. Which is what True Lemon offers. A little lemon for your water, tea or whatever. In convenient take with you packets to tuck into your handbag or pocket or a desk drawer.





I have been meaning to buy and try this stuff but I keep forgetting to grab it when I am at the store. So, imagine my delight when I clicked on Jen's blog and saw a link for a FREE SAMPLE! Now I can try it out before I buy. And so can you. Go ahead. Click the link. You know that you want to.

In other news, in spite of my roller coaster, waaahhh, poor little me, pissy brat, puff monster week, I got on my scale this morning. Puffy legs and all and had a drop of .6 pound. Not stellar, but it was a drop, not a bounce and that was in spite of my puff. I am grateful. And I know that fat has gone bye-bye, since I weight less, even with my bloaty-ness. :)

My attitude seems to be better. I feel more optimistic, this morning. The dark cloud that was hovering over me and pulling my mood down and screwing with my head seems to be clearing out and I am not so whiny, down on myself and pessimistic. I still have some more work to do but I am in a better place.

Support. It works.

And it is here, for all of us. All we have to do is ask.

I am so glad that I asked.

And that I can be here when someone else does so.

It is cold, this morning. It was 30 degrees, when I got out of bed. The temp has climbed to 33. But it is supposed to be sunny and 71 degrees, for a high, today. My cat is blissing out in front of my fireplace. He sure does like to soak up the warm.

Okay, I need another cup of crack coffee. And I think I will go read up on new entries in my blogroll and see what you are all up to, this fine morning.

Later, gators.

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

My Ass is Duly Kicked

And thank you all for it. Because I needed it. :D

Today is going well. Much better. A little tough love and a little perspective have been extremely helpful.

I lurves you guys. <3

Roller Coaster

I am riding a roller coaster this week.

Again.

One day I do a stellar job, the next, I am struggling to stay under 2000 calories. Then back, again. *sigh* What the fuck is my malfunction?

If I register a loss, this week, I will die of shock. I am not anticipating doing so. The Puff Monster has me firmly in his clutches, again.

I am so sick of this shit.

The thing is, I know what do do about it and I know how to do it. Obviously. I just keep running up against a brisk wall of mental resistance. It is mental. I am not hungry, but I snack. I am not bingeing and I suppose that is a victory. But it doesn't feel like on when I snack and graze, instead.

I am aware of the problem. Now I have to implement an action plan.

Like staying the fuck on track.

Yeah.

Look at me.

The rocket scientist.

I suck

Monday, October 25, 2010

Splendid

Pomegranates are in season, right now and sort of on sale at my local supermarket, so I grabbed a couple when we were shopping, the other day. Last night, I opened one up and got all the seeds out. I gave a few to Husband and he tasted, thought about it, tasted a few more and decided that he loves them. Son, of course loves them, too. Those two ate so many of the seeds, I only got a few. lol

Pomegranate seeds are splendid. A lot of work but worth it. I seeded the other one, tonight and put some of the seeds in my salad at dinner and had the rest of my share (I made sure to get mine, first, tonight lol) in a cup of Fage with a packet of Splenda for dessert. I smashed some of the seeds in the yoghurt and stirred in the juice and the rest of the seeds and... Oh. My. Gosh! Sooo good.

Did you know that the seeds from a whole pomegranate is only 104 calories? :D

All of my beautiful clouds have cleared out and there will only be sunny skies, for the foreseeable future. The temperature is dropping and a freeze warning is in effect. I don't know if it will freeze here in Prescott but it will a little higgher up.

I was nicely on track, today. I thought about joining in in Allen's Double Dog Dare You challenge... I like a good dare... But I got wind of it, too late. Maybe I'll join in if he runs another one.

Okay, I am stupid and boring, today and have absolutely nothing else to talk about.

 

A Quiet Weekend

I didn't write a peep. I think I needed less computer time, more IRL time, if you know what I mean? :D I did pop in a couple of times to check up on you all, my gentle readers. I wanted to be assured that everyone was fine.

My weekend was busy I had a lot of running around to do, I needed to pop into the urgent care to get this eyelid and my ear checked out. Turns out my eyelid is just a little unspecified dermatitis/eczema and my ear isn't infected. I have a blocked eustation tube. I got some cortico steroids to help with the symptoms on my lid and I am waiting for the go ahead from my insurance company for drainage massage therapy to alleviate my symptoms. I have suffered with them for so many years that relief would be a blessing. I should know sometime this week.

We did a pile of grocery shopping ans went out just cruising around. Watched movies at night and I snacked on a few too many dry Cheerios while watching Apollo 13 the other night. (I didn't blow my daily calorie allowance by much, tho.) All in all it was a pretty okay weekend.

Now it is time for another routine week to begin. Sometimes I find comfort in routine, sometimes it chafes me horribly. But I guess one of my life lessons is acceptance. And I have to practice it nearly daily. *sigh*

It is a beautiful day, today. Chilly, cloudy and windy. I am hoping for some rain, later to just round it out, perfectly.

Okay, I had no insights, wisdom or otherwise deep thought, really. I just wanted to check in and I am going to go and read your blogs, now.

Later, gators. :D

Friday, October 22, 2010

Full of Evil Glee

Ha! It is defective. The sound cuts out when you push the headphone jack all the way in and if you move the player around. Which makes it useless to me, since I want it for walking. It had to go back. I feel vindicated. And a little evil, too. But not evil enough to say that I am sorry.

Husband said that we should go up to Best Buy and check out MP3 players there. I heartily agreed. That way I can play with the display models, compare and chose the one that I really want. I think that while we are up there, I am going to window shop digital cameras. My little camera that has served me so well and faithfully and which I really do love is beginning to show it's age and is having trouble. I can only shoot about seven pictures and it shuts it's self off and then I turn it back on and try to snap another shot and it does the same thing. I can't be without a camera, taking pictures is kind of like breathing for me. So, a replacement will have to be acquired, soon.

I think I am going to have to break down and go to a doctor. *sigh* I have a puffy eyelid that is getting worse and the puff is beginning to spread further around my eye. Probably cellulitus, or something stupid. I am also cooking an ear infection and it isn't going down on it's own, this time so I am going to need a course of antibiotics. Might as well kill them both in one visit.  Blech! I hate going to the doctor. Seriously. I don't normally go unless I am dragged, bleeding or doubled over in pain into the ER. Oh well. We all must do that which we do not want to do.

Well, this was all very fascinating. Add to it the fact that I have another frakking migraine and the bitch-fest is complete. If you skipped the last entry and this one, I don't blame you. It is all a bunch of whine and cheeze.

How Long Does it Take To Charge An MP3 Player, Anyway?

So, Husband bought me an MP3 player while he was out, earlier. I synched my music library onto it and am waiting for it to finish charging so that I can play with it and get acquainted with it. I am having to do everything just as I go, since the stupid instruction book is just a jumble of idiotic, confusing pictures, nothing written. I hate it when electronics companies do this. Why can't they just print a booklet telling us how to make it work, for cripe's sake? Gah!

I am grateful to have it. I wanted an MP3 player for when I go walking and so forth but I am also kind of... No, make that really pissed. You see, this isn't the device I would have chosen and I am upset that once again, he took it upon himself to decide for me. Choose for me. Make me just accept what he brings to me. I had no input, I didn't get to look at the selection available, compare and chose for myself. And he has done this so many times and just doesn't hear me when I say that I want... Need to make my own fucking choices. *sigh* Is that too much to ask?

I know that he wanted to do something nice for me. But he takes too much upon himself and it makes me feel marginalized, unheard, unimportant. I feel resentful and I am angry and it just heaps more resentment up in my heart against him. Funny how something so small can bring on such a large storm.

I will swallow this resentment, as I always do. I will pretend that it is great, that I am happy as a clam and not let him see that I am madder than a hornet. That I am frustrated and every time I look at that little device I want to cry, because, once again, it is foisted upon me and isn't what I wanted. Because if I didn't , he would turn this around, talk about how I am ungrateful, that nothing he ever does is good enough, blah, blah, blah. He will make me feel like shit. He is really good at that, making me feel like shit. In fact, I kind of do, right now. And he didn't say a word. I guess I am well trained. lol?

Anyway, if the thing ever gets finished charging, I hope it is easy to use. And works.

Still charging.

And still pissed.

Nice combination, huh?

It is a nice day, today. Chilly, cloudy and rainy. Just my kind of weather. I need to make my shopping list, grocery day, tomorrow. I want to get out as early as possible and get done in the store before it gets too crowded.

I am on track, today. I'll be making chicken for dinner, tonight. It is too rainy to use my grill so I'll bake it. I am going to cook rice in chicken broth and make a salad and open a can of corn. I know that corn isn't the best veggie (I know... It is s grain, really) but sometimes I just want me some corn, dammit. :D

Still charging. lol

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Well, It's About Frakking Time!

My scale is finally on the move, once again. 321.6 this morning. A loss of 3.6 pounds. Whew!

Guess my stall/plateau has ended.

1.6 pounds and I am out of the 320's at last. I have been here for a loooooong time. And I am a little sick of the view. I am ready to hit the teens, then the ones and finally drop the three, for good. I am so. sick of having a three as the first number of my weight. It has been this way for far, far, far, far too long and it is time to get rid of it, once and for all.

Then I can concentrate on getting rid of the two. :D

Chilly, wet morning. It was raining when I woke up but it is clearing, now. Of course! This is Arizona, after all. Clouds don't like to hang out, here.

I am having my first cup of coffee and I need to go change the pounds lost on my I Refuse to Blow It Challenge. Then I am going to see what you are all up to, this morning.

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Just Another Day in Paradise

Not all that exciting around here, right now. I am on track. I did housework. I have a headbanger. Routine.

I did a little blogkeeping, deleted blogs from my blogroll that were abandoned or that I just didn't read. I think I accidentally deleted one that I didn't want to... But I don't know for sure. I will find it, again if I did. I am not heartless, really. I just thought that it was time to trim my bloated blogroll a little.

It was chilly today. Windy and much cooler and cloudy. We got a little rain, too. I love this kind of weather. :D


 I leave you with a few funny pics I received in some of those pass-it-along-e-mails. Enjoy. :D






Have a great night, all

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

My E-Mail Address

If any of you have tried to contact me by e-mail at the address that was listed on my contact page, I am so sorry. I just learned, tonight that I, the moron of the century had my own e-mail address written down wrong. I have corrected it and it is working just fine.

Does anyone have a spare brain lying around?

Bleargh!

If a Well Fed Crotch is a Happy Crotch

Mine should be ecstatic. As I walked, today my crotch spent two miles eating the legs of my capris. They are so loose that the legs just get gobbled right up. My capris are getting so loose that not only are the legs and ass baggy, the crotch hangs down nice and low, too. At least they aren't falling down around my ankles. The waistlines are well tapered in and they stay up.

It is time to switch over to leggings. I have one pair and they are more fitted and should stay in place. I need to buy a few pair, in ankle and capri length for walking. Then I can leave my capris for around the house grubby work.

Husband clocked my new walk route for me in his work truck, since it has a trip odometer. It is just a few feet shy of one full mile. The odometer was just tipping to turn to one mile, so close enough. I figure that the driveway and the frontage road make up the last few feet. :D Hell, the driveway alone should be worth extra credit. lol

I guess Husband is over trying to eat healthier and exercise. I have tried but there is only so much I can do. He needs to do the rest. Eating food like he does and drinking that sugary soda is a huge mistake and with him being borderline diabetic, his health could go sharply downhill fast. But, I am not his mama. He is an adult and he can make his own choices. I can't make them for him. I will help him, if he wants me to. But I can't force him to into it.

Well, that is about all I have to yap about, right now.

May I just add that those blasted word verification when posting comments drive me in. sane! I hate those frakking things.  I am always delighted when I get to comment without having to struggle with those things.

Okay, carry on. :)

Return of the Grilled Cheese

Ahhh... Grilled cheese sandwiches. What is better than two pieces of hot, toasted, buttery bread encasing a thick layer of melted, ooey-gooey cheddar (or any other cheese you happen to love or have on hand) cheese?

Losing the excess weight that hot, toasted buttery bread encasing a thick layer of melted, ooey-gooey cheddar cheese can add to your frame.

Yeah... Grilled cheese sandwiches are sublime in the extreme but they aren't good for us. Until now...

You see, I was craving a grilled cheese. Big time. But, traditional grilled cheese, the way I learned how to make and eat them is certainly not something I choose to eat at this phase in my life. But... But I really, really wanted a grilled cheese. For lunch. Today.

What to do?

Why, make it the right way, of course. :D

So, that is precisely what I did. Here is how I made a healthy, good for me grilled cheese sandwich.

Spray a small nonstick frying pan or griddle with Pam and a little buttery spray (I use I Can't Believe It's Not Butter Spray.) and place it over medium heat. Place the bottom half of a thin bun in the pan, cut side up. As the pan heats, slice one ounce of light~2%~ cheddar cheese (or other cheese you love) and place it on the thin bun. Top it with the other half of the thin bun, spray the top with a little Pam and buttery spray and clap a lid over it. Let it cook, under the lid until the bun is nice and brown and toasted and the cheese is melting. Flip and continue cooking (with the lid off) until the other half of the thin bun is toasted and brown and the cheese is all melted and beginning to oooooooooze out a little. Flip out onto your plate and let cool just long enough so that you don't burn your little fingers and mouth and go to it.

My sandwich, made with an Earth Grains whole grain thin bun and one ounce of 2% cheddar came to 190 calories. Not too shabby for something so tasty. You can get the calorie count down a little further by using light bread, usually 80 to 90 calories for a two slice portion and fat free cheese *shudder*. If you have read this blog, at all, you know how I feel about fat free dairy products. The only exceptions being fat free 1/2 and 1/2 and my buttery spray. In my not so humble personal opinion, fat free cheese is nasty and tastes like a half melted plastic mac.

Oh! Piccie of the yum? Right here. :D






I had mine with a side of apple slices. *sigh* Happy, now. :)


In other not so important news, it is another nice day, here. My windows are open, the sun is shining, cicadas are doing their thing in the cottonwoods and thunderheads are beginning to build. Is it October? "Cause I have to tell you, I am exceedingly confused, here. It is supposed to be Fall.

Oh well.

Eating is right on track and I am hydrating well. My head is clear and calm and it isn't even pounding as bad as it was, yesterday. :D

I am ripping CDs to my computer. I had all of my music on my other laptop and when it went tits up, I found myself needing to do it all over again. I have over one hundred CDs. This is a task that takes a little time. I just do a few here and there and I will soon have them all on this 'puter. Probably just in time for this one to crash. lol

I am beginning to plan Thanksgiving dinner. I have a healthy menu in mind. Poor Son is devastated. lol He loves all of the stuff that makes up a ten thousand calories a plate Thanksgiving dinner but I just don't want to do that, this year. I have a couple of recipes in mind that I want to take for a test run before the big day. If they are good, I will post them. If not... You will hear nothing more about them.

Okay, I suppose I have nattered on long enough.

Monday, October 18, 2010

Woot!

I have 201 followers! Holy moley! I never thought that I would see the day that my little, badly written blog would have so many followers. I am overwhelmed by this and grateful and happy that you all wanted to follow little old me. <3

One of my new followers is a newer blogger. She is Orwellchick and like so many of us, she has a long, hard odyssey ahead of her. I know that I can count on you lovely people to go and show her some bloggy love and make her welcome. :D

Ew! We have been skunked, again. Dammit! Skunks belong out in the forest, not hanging out here in town, making us want to gag from their stink. That was one of the worst things about living up in Highland Pines, being skunked all the time. For quite a while after we moved her to town, skunks weren't all that much of a problem but in this last year it is as if they have decided to go urban. And, of course, the little fuckers loooove to spray when it is humid so that their malodourous emanations really have some serious hang time. that we can enjy it for a good, long time. *gag!!!*

I finally decided to stop waiting for the husband unit to get off his ass and join me for walking and I got dressed and took off for a nice walk by myself, this evening. I walked up Willow Creek to Country Park and turned around and came back. All the way out was uphill, some of it pretty hard uphill, especially for over three hundred pounds of fat broad. And I didn't just stroll, I kept up a brisk pace almost all the way out, slowing slightly at the last hard pull. Once I got to the light, I turned and cruised happily home. Golly, downhills are nice.

I got home, feeling very full of myself for taking a great walk and remembered that I still had to haul myself up The Driveway. (Insert deep, echoing voice, here.) You see, we have a longish, extremely steep driveway from the frontage road up to our condo. Going down, I had to be very careful, I could have easily fallen and rolled down, like a giant pink and blue bear rolling down a hill. Not pretty, or comfortable. lol When I got home, I stood at the foot of the drive, stared up and for a moment I decided that I would just live down there. Then I gathered my ballz and humped myself up that drive. I had to stop a couple of times but I made it. Then, when I got to my front door which I had left unlocked, I was locked out. I knew why, right away, as Husband's work truck was in the drive. So I got to stand outside my own home and ring the frakking doorbell to get let in. *seriously rolling my eyes, here*

So, it felt good to get out and I enjoyed being alone, no husband, no son. Just me, myself and I, my thoughts and the darkening sky, stars beginning to show in the deep, grey-blue sky, the moon riding low and it's light competing with the streetlights for attention. :)

I'm nicely tired, now and I should sleep well, tonight. 

What Brown Did For Me

My UPS guy dropped off the Biggest Loser scale I won in a giveaway recently held by Lady Lap Band. The box was so well packed, Bed Bath and Beyond really go out of their way to package their shipments. Under all of the packing material was pretty white tissue paper printed all over with soft purple stars. The scale, it's self was wrapped in pretty wrap and tied with a purple satin ribbon and bow. There was also a lovely little gift card with a message. It was lovely and like receiving a present.

The scale is nice. It is small and low profile, which I love, it makes it easy to use and store in my tiny kitchen. It works great and, has enough features to be very useful but is easy, peasy to use. A must for this tech challenged chica. :D

 My scale, all wrapped in pretty paper and ribbon. 

In use. Weighing my apple pear. (All apple pears that come into this house are mine. lol)

It is a cool day, breezy and clouds rolling in. I am hoping for more rain. :D

Food is okay... I am sitting at just over 900 calories, so far. I would be happier with myself if it were a bit lower. But it is by no means a catastrophe. I will still come in on target for the day and that is what counts. :D

I have housework to do but I am being a lazy slag and not doing it. I did make my bed and run my dishwasher. But not much else is getting done. I'll get at it, tomorrow. I am just not in the mood, today. 

My head is bad, again. I was getting flashing pindots and bigger, coloured circles in front of my eyes yesterday and last night and today, it is all rock and roll in my brain. Urgh! I had a few days break, tho for which I am grateful. This last head storm was a long, rough one. I am hoping that this one isn't as bad. We'll see.

Okay, I think I will go troll my blogroll and read everyone's updates. Later, lovies. :D

Sunday, October 17, 2010

Wow

Just wow!

I am overwhelmed by all of the positive responses I got to my last post. I have to admit, I sat and stared at my computer screen for a good long while before I clicked the publish button. A part of me was really afraid that I was going to piss a lot of people off and would wake flamed off the surface of the planet. But I feel so strongly about this issue. And I just had to talk about it. :)

It is a gorgeous day, today. We awoke to partly cloudy skies, warm temps and plenty of sunshine. By noon, that had changed. A storm blew in, the sky became dark and low and menacing, the wind kicked up and lightening crackled and thunder boomed. And the rains came down. Then it quieted a little, the temps dropped a bit and another round fired up. Then it got even cooler and rained some more. It is cool and very cloudy and I am hoping for even more rain.

How I love weather like this! The cool and clouds and rain really make it feel like Fall. :D

This is a treat, in this part of the country, this time of year. Fall here is normally cool, dry and very sunny.

Husband has the on call phone, this weekend and with the storm he is pretty busy answering calls, dispatching techs and putting out fires. Which is fine, we can use the extra money. But it is a bit of a pain, since it is hard to watch a movie when his phone keeps ringing and he keeps shutting it off to check channels and prescribe the appropriate action. Oh well. It is his job. And needs to be done.

I have enough calories to have stew and a biscuit for dinner. Yum. What could be better on a cloudy, chilly, rainy Fall day?  :D

Have a great evening. Tomorrow starts a new week and I hope that all of you have a wonderful, productive, on your track week.

Saturday, October 16, 2010

Selfish Bitch

For whom are you doing this?

For whom are you counting calories/carbs/points?

For whom did you have gastric bypass?

For whom did you get a lap band inserted? A sleeve fashioned? A gastric switch switched?

For whom do you get up and walk/jog/run?

For whom do you sweat out mile after mile after mile on a treadmill, an elliptical, a glider?

For whom do you lift weights? Do crunches? Upright rows and bicep curls?

For whom do you step on that scale and glory in or moan in frustration at the number that you see?

I do it for me.

Me.

Not for my family.

Not for my husband.

Not for my son.

Not for my friends.

Not for anyone but me.

You see, I am a selfish bitch. I have to be. I believe that when I embarked on this wondrous and terrible odyssey, I had to cast aside my concern for my husband, my son, my extended family and friends. I had to look deep within myself and ask myself honestly "For whom are you doing this?" My answer had to be and continues to be "Myself." While I have no doubt that others will, in one way or another benefit, as will I from my steadily improving health, they are not my first and most important reason.

You see, they aren't the ones living in this torture chamber of a body. They aren't the ones with the screaming hips and crackling knees. They aren't the ones carrying more than two hundred pounds of excess fat. (Actually, it is about 185, now... ;)) I am. I am the one. This is my life. This is my health. This is my chance. This is for me.

The selfish bitch.

Be a selfish bitch. Decide that this fight is for you. For your reasons. For your life. For your health. Remember, it isn't until we take care of ourselves and are in the best health and shape we can be, that we can fully take care of others. On an airplane, during the pre flight the flight attendants tell us about the oxygen masks. That, in the event of loss of cabin pressure they will drop, supplying you with the oxygen you need to live. They instruct you to take the mask and put it on yourself before you attempt to put one on a spouse or child. You have to be sure that you can breathe, before you can save someone else. You are no good to little Timmy and little Muffy if your brain, starved of oxygen shuts down and you pass out and die. And you are no good to your family if you are so heavy that you can't be there for them, fully and actively all the time.

It is only after you are selfish that you can be generous.

So, be a selfish bitch.

Saturday Morning in Prescott, Arizona

It is sunny. The daytime high is supposed to be in the 75 degree range. Unseasonably warm, but not unwelcome. I don't really have plans for the day. I have my housework done, I have sucked down a lovely latte that Husband brought home for me and I am thinking about what I would like for breakfast. I can't decide between oatmeal and an Egg Beaters and egg white scramble. I am probably going to go for the scramble, I have grilled chicken in the fridge that would be yummy in it and I can give my egg yolks to my dog. She hasn't been really excited about her dog food, lately and the yolks tempt her and she eats better.

Ahhh... Quiet. Peace. Solitude. Son is at work and Husband just left to take his parental units shopping. It's just me and the hair bags.

Okay, my mind is blank. So, I will be back when I actually have something constructive to say.

Oh... Food yesterday was good... 1535 calories. Better. :D

Friday, October 15, 2010

Review: Loreal Voluminous Million Lashes Mascara

Hello my dear ones. (Don't you just love those phishing spam e-mails from Burqina Faso that start that way?lololol) I have a review for you.

I finally tried my new Loreal Voluminous Million Lashes mascara, today. I was initially drawn by the "Ooo! Shiny!" packaging and the promises the commercials made to me. Promises that I would have full, gorgeous lashes and no clumping, thanks to the "pop" that cleans the excess product off the brush as you pull it from the tube. I bought mine at Walgreen's. I paid just shy of $8.00. I chose black.

Note: All pictures are clickable. 

 Pretty, shiny tube.

I got ready to apply my mascara by first priming my lids, applying shadow and liner and curling my lashes.


Bare lashes. Or, as I like to call them... Invisilashes. :P

I opened the tube and pulled out the wand and it did pop softly. The inner structure did clean the excess off the brush very nicely but I still had to touch the very end to a tissue, as the tube doesn't clean the very tip. The brush was a bit of a surprise, at first. It is bigger, fatter than any mascara brush I have ever seen or used and I was a little afraid that It would feel as if I were trying to apply mascara with a porcupine on a stick.

Application wasn't all that intimidating, after all. I got used to the brush pretty quickly, it turned out to be very soft and easy to use. Just be careful doing your bottom lashes. lol The mascara applied surprisingly smoothly and there was little excess on my lashes. It did make them look fuller and thicker. They did clump together a little, but not nearly as much as they do with other brands or my formerly much loved Lash Out! mascara. I decided not to comb my lashes, as I wanted to see how this stuff performed without combing. I applied one full coat to upper and lower lashes. Then a very light second coat to my upper lashes, only. (I forgot for a second that I wanted to take a pic before that second coat. Addlepated, I am.)



After application. One full coat, top and bottom lashes, a second light coat to top lashes. (I use a light hand when I apply mascara, your results will vary, depending on how you apply.) My lashes don't look like the lashes in the commercial and I didn't expect them to. You know that they use fakaloo lashes in mascara print ads and commercials, don't you?

One thing I was surprised about is that this mascara has a scent. Kind of... Floral and spicy. It reminds me a little of honeysuckle. I have extremely sensitive eyes and I was concerned that the fragrance would irritate or hurt my eyes but it has proven to not be a problem. I applied this an hour ago and I can still smell it a little, now and then. If you dislike fragrance in your makeup or are very sensitive to scents, this mascara may not be your cup of tea.

Overall, I like this mascara. It applies nicely, looks good and doesn't make a mess. Tho I will definitely comb between coats, as usual. I don't even much mind the fragrance. I will happily use this tube and likely buy more. :D

Three Words:

Fuck the Lake!

Seriously.

Husband and I decided to walk in the mornings, since getting out in the evenings is a logistical nightmare. And, figuring that the nasty clouds of bugs wouldn't be present in the A.M., we hit the trails. It was lovely and cool, and the air was clear of tiny, annoying winged creatures. Until the frakking sun came up. Then the bugs did, too.

Clouds of swirling, flying, nasty, horrible, fucking bugs. The walk to the end of Normal Trail was lovely.

The walk back to the car was a nightmare. A mile has never felt so long, in my entire life. I walked as fast as I could, arms flapping wildly in front of my face. I actually considered trying to run, just to get back to the car a little faster.

Ugh! Misery! The lake is out of the question until a good freeze settles the flying hoards.

It's a hell of a thing, having to choose to inhale bugs or car exhaust. I'll take the exhaust. It is more toxic than bugs, but far less unpleasant to walk through. 

I like walking in the morning. I don't have to sit around all day, stewing about it, It is done. And so is my housework and I am on to laundry. I have had my first cup of Joe and am ready for number two and my brekkie.

And I need to get another load in the washer.

I want to thank all of you for your kind comments, words, commiseration and hints. *huge cyber hugs to all of you!!!!* This is why we need this community. When we hit a low, we have so many lovely people to flock to us, lift us up and help us through a dark patch. I for one, couldn't be doing this without all of you.

I had my freakout, yesterday, ate badly, pouted and sulked and basically acted like a brat. I am fine, today. Back on track, back to walking and renewed in mind and body. And ready to go forward. I know... I have been saying that a lot, lately. Guess it has been a bit of a rough patch. *rolling my eyes* A part of me is beyond jazzed that I have lost 75 pounds, so far. The other part is like, in a huge sulk because I still have so far to go. And I suppose one side was warring with the other, messing up my head and I was letting it happen, for my own, silly, yet unsussedout reasons.

Whatever. I am over that shit, now. :D And ready for the next 25 to get me under that big 300. That is my immediate goal, at present. Under 300.

Okay, I need to go put the first load in the dryer, get the next load in and make some eggs. I am in need of protein, this morning.

I'll talk to all of you loverly people and read your updates in a while.

Later, gators! :D

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Well, Fiddle Dee Dee

Methinks I am experiencing my very first ever plateau. My scale told me that I am still 325.2, this morning. I know that I am not eating enough calories to maintain my weight so there is no other explanation I can come up with.

I have lost seventy-five pounds... Maybe my bod has decided that it is time for a good, old fashioned stall. (Stupid bod, anyway.) I am frustrated but I am not discouraged. I am not going to fly off the rails and do something stupid or harmful. I am just going to stay on track, keep on keeping on and sooner or later, this stall will break and my numbers will be headed in the right direction, once again.

*sigh*

*sigh*

I lied. I do feel a bit discouraged and I am mad and, funnily enough, a bit sad. This will pass. But I guess I need to pout and wallow a little.

Sorry to be a Dippy Downer. (I don't like to say Debbie Downer. I read blogs by lovely Debbies and they are anything but a downer! :D) I'll get over myself and be just fine.

Action plan:

Stay on track.

Get out and walk more consistently, again. I have been allowing life to get in the way of my exercise, again. Time to turn that back around. Exercise is more important. So is my health, dammit!

Okay, I think I have whined enough, for now. 

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Good Morning

I hope that you are all getting off to a good start, this fine A.M.

I have had a somewhat busy morning. I have about half of what I want to get done today done. I read all of the new blog entries that popped up on my blogroll and now, I want another coffee and my brekkie. And I think I will watch The Biggest Loser (don't you just love DVRs? :D) then dust, run my vacuum and swish and swipe my bathroom.

See you all later. :D

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

I am Kevelling

I had a busy day, today. Did my housework, then decided to do a few extra projects. I washed my pillows, mattress pad and freshened up my feather bed, today. The feather bed was easy, I just took it out onto my deck, hung it over the railing and spritzed it down well with a mixture of Downy and water in a spray bottle. Let it dry, repeated, flipped it and did the same thing on the other side. Now, you might ask why I don't take it in and have it cleaned. Because it would cost less to just buy a new feather bed. And mine is still in pretty good shape, it was just a bit stale and needed some freshening up. The Downy and water, sunshine and fresh air did the trick.

Two of my pillows are feather, too. I put them in the washer and let it start doing it's thing and looked in to see that they were all blown up, full of air. So I had to push them down into the water and agitate them by hand. In the machine because they wouldn't depuff. (Hmmm... Sounds familiar... :P) Then I let them spin and the washer fill for rinse. Then I had to push them down and agitate them by hand in the rinse water, then I let them spin out. And ran the spin cycle twice more. I had to let them stay in the dryer through three full cycles. Big, fat, king sized feather pillows take a long time to dry thoroughly. lol But they came out clean and fresh and just as fat and fluffy as when they were new. I still don't know if washing them again will be worth the hassle.

While all that was going on, I spritzed my mattress with the Downy and water mix and let it dry under my ceiling fan a couple of times so it could be freshened up, too. And I turned it, as I have been sleeping on the same side since Spring before last.

So, I am tired. I have been working my tail off around here the last couple do fays and my back and hips are killing me and I am taking tomorrow off! lol I will just do straightening and a quick once over, then I am going to plant my ass and rest my poor hip and back.

Lady Lap Band held a giveaway for a Biggest Loser digital food scale and... I won! I am so excited to win a prize in a giveaway and I am really appreciative of this. I need a digital scale, my poor old dial scale finally gave up the ghost and the old budget is tight, so this came at just the right time.

Thank You, Lady Lap Band! <3

 Food is good, today. I am topping out at 1440 calories for the day. I'll tell ya, come Thursday I had better have a loss on that scale. If I don't, I have some serious reassessing to do, I guess I am screwing up, somewhere.

Jay Leno just said that some study states that sleeping with a light on can cause obesity. Really? Hmmm... I sleep with a light on. I always fall asleep reading and I am afraid of the dark. So, that is why I am fat? It wasn't all that shit I shoved down my pie hole all those years? Dayumn! Does that mean that if I turn my lamp off and sleep in the dark I will magically be skinny? 

There you have it, my sweets. The answer to the obesity epidemic and the reason why you and I are fat. It's those damned bedside lamps. 

Chocolate cake for everyone! (Just be sure you turn off that light before you go nighty-night lolol)


All right. Who the heck knocked my plant over? Insensitive so and so's. They knocked down my poor widdle baby philodendron. Where is a triffid when you need it? ^^

Welp... I guess that is all I have, right now. 

Goodnight, gentle readers. 

Ooops! Sorry about the black font colour. I forgot I have a dark background and I don't know the html code to change the colour. (I know Vb but not html.) And I am not going to re-type all of that. 



Monday, October 11, 2010

Just a Quickie

I can't just leave you all hanging, now can I?

Yeah, I know... Boo! Hiss! *ducking tomatoes*

Another pretty, pretty day. 80 degrees or so. Light breeze. Sunshine a plenty. Windows wide open and just enjoying the unseasonably gorgeous temps. Last year, I hung up Hallowe'en lights at this time and it was very, very chilly. I am going to hang up the lights, tomorrow and it will be sunny, warm and lovely.

So... Food is good, today. I am sitting at 1183. A little choccie pudding... An apple pear... Plenty of calories to indulge in a goodie, later.

Damn dog needs to go out. BRB.

Okay, Sabryna has been out, I folded my towels and put them away, too. Four loads of laundry, today. I did a lot of cleaning, too. You know, scrubbing the bathroom, sweeping and mopping floors, vacuuming, dusting. I am a tired old broad.

Oh! Kaboom in the purple trigger bottle? It is of goodness. Spray it on, leave it for about three minutes, wipe with a wet sponge and rinse well. Fabulously clean shower walls and tub with little real effort. One caution if you have never used the stuff, it is fume-y. I am talking make you cough up a lung fume-y. Run your vent fan, open windows. You will get used to it, but the first few minutes will be rough. I need to remember to pick up a pair of Playtex gloves, tho. My poor hands are as dry as dead Autumn leaves. Ouch!

I picked up a tube of that new Loreal mascara, the Voluminous Millionlashes stuff. It comes in a very snazzy gold case (I am such a packaging ho... Seriously, put something in a pretty tube or jar and I will have to have it) and promises extreme volume without any clumps. We shall see. I will do a review when I try it. :D

Okay, I am off to get into the shower. Now that I have clean towels, I can clean myself. Shouldn't have let the laundry go so long, I guess... :P

Sunday, October 10, 2010

Answering Amey in Idaho

Well, here's the thing, Amey. since I don't know what exactly she put in the food ( I have known her long enough to have a pretty good idea) I err on the side of caution. I compute my calories as best I can, round up then add some additional, just to be on the safe side. Seems to work. lol

I would love to go walking with you. That would be fun. :D

I am Now Wearing a Gas Mask

Well...

Not really.

Not yet.

But I will need one, soon if this keeps up.

Have you any idea what it is like to be trapped in a house with two men and a cat who all think that farting is high, good theatre?

It was a lovely day, today. Warm, but not hot. Tiny breeze. Sunny. We went out, did a little shopping and drove around and chatted. Stopped at Sonic for half price drinks. A diet cherry limeaid tastes even better when I get it for fifty percent off. :D

Food is good, on track. I didn't eat much until tonight, so I had plenty of calories in reserve for some of MIL's yummy, tender, done to a perfect turn roast. I had a little gravy and a baked potato with it. (I passed on the buttery, milky mashed potatoes.) And two biscuits. I know... But it was good and I was hongry. And I am still well within my target calorie range for the day. And I got some exercise, tramping around the stores. :D While we were in the mall, I popped into Dillard's and petted the Dooneys and drooled all over the Kors bag I saw online and waaaant.You'd think since I slobbered all over it, they would have been disgusted and given it to me... But, noooo.

Oh well.

It seems that Husband has another kidney stone. He has pain in his back in that spot, again and thinks he can feel it moving. Poor thing, He is going to call his doctor and get some help with this thing. I feel really bad for him. He was miserable with the last one. I hope that this one isn't as bad.

Okay, I need to go wash my face. It wants out of this makeup, now.

And if I lock myself in the bathroom, maybe I can get some clean air into my lungs.

Hey, a girl can dream, can't she?

Saturday, October 9, 2010

I Have My Very Own Explosive Man

And I am convinced that he is trying to kill me.

The farting.

The shitting and not running the vent fan.

I'm dying, here.

help...

Caturday

Hello darlings. I hope that your weekend is getting off to a fine start, that your skies are blue, your breezes soft and you are on track, still in your minds, happy in your hearts.

Life is nuts. And not so much, all at the same time. I didn't post yesterday. I took a day long vacation from my head. Sometimes I need to do that. Get out of my head and pretend that it isn't here. I feel a little refreshed, today and ready to be "here" again. I think I was also in avoidance of the fact that my eating has been pretty much crap over the last two days. I spout about not letting the number on the scale bother me then I let it get inside my brain, wiggle in there, drive me crazy and I react badly.  lash out at myself, punish myself for not getting the job done in the best and worst way I know how.

I didn't binge. I suppose that is to be commended. Maybe? But I did go into the 2500 calorie range for two days in a row. *sigh* That shouldn't make me gain weight but it certainly isn't beneficial to me or my efforts.

I am back on track, physically and more importantly, mentally today.

My... What a bunch of self absorbed whining. lol

Anyhoozle, it is a gorgeous day, today. Sunny and it is supposed to warm up very nicely.It is supposed to be about 90 down in the Valley, today. It would be so much fun to go spend a day down there, drive around, shop, hang out. I need a day out, some time away. Some fun.

Okay, I am back. It is now night. Had a sort of busy day. And am anticipating an even busier one, tomorrow. Which is fine. I keep busy, I don't sit and think about stuffing my fat, self indulgent face.

I made chicken for dinner, I grilled three and baked three. Yes, Husband wants his baked with the Shak and Bake shit and it was warm, today which meant a hot, hot house. Blech! Why can't Mr. Picky Butt just eat what the rest of us are eating? Gah! I made baked potatoes and a big, fresh green salad. I guess the boyzies were hungry, between the two of them they killed off four big pieces of chicken. I had one and there was one left to put away for a future meal. Man, the way we go through chicken, I should buy stock in a chicken farm, or something. lol

So, after the last two not so stellar days, I am ending up very nicely on track. I feel better and better about myself and what I am doing. So that is positive. :D

I have enough calories saved back for a little swettie. Meesathinkin' a dark chocolate sugar free pudding. Jello makes gooood dark chocolate sugar free pudding. 60 calories of smooth, creamy heaven in a little cup. I love dark chocolate. With some kind of stupid passion.

Aw, fuck! The Yankees just made it into the ALCS, I am so sick of seeing that team in the playoffs every. frakking. year. And if I have to hear Frank Sinatra sing New York, New York one more time...

***Gag!***

It is supposed to be a lovely day, tomorrow. In the seventies and sunny. Should be a nice day to get out of this house, get some shopping done.

I am soooo tired of this current headache. This is over a week, now. I am ready for it to go bye-bye and have a little break before the next one comes on in.

Can I just say how much I love the fact that Blogger saves posts I back out of? I got to just finish the one I started earlier, rather than plow through a whole new entry. :D

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Call the Waaaaahhhhmbulance!



Need to whine, a little.

My body is weird as hell. And it is driving me in. sane!

At least I am getting the hang of what it does, now. I record a couple of decent losses, then the games begin. The next week it is Puff City and a bounce up. The next week, much, not all of the puff is gone. I am level where I was two weeks ago. (That is what happened this week... I lost .4 pound. Blech!) Next week, I should record a nice loss, again. Then maybe one more week to record loss, then the whole fun (yeah, riiiight!) cycle will repeat.

I know that this is fliud and so forth... It is not possible for me to maintain on the calorie levels I consume.

*sigh*

We all have our burdens. Mine is my crazy bod and insanely fluctuating numbers on my scale.

I'm going to drink my coffee and pout for a while.

I might be back later.

I will be back later.

*sigh*

I can't stay away.

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Tornadoes in Arizona!


Who'da thunk it? I am glad that they all hit farther to the North but I am not happy that peoples' homes were destroyed. The storms are clearing and the forecast calls for sunny skies and slightly warmer temperatures, from now on.

I am a little heavy on calories, today. I think the weather was messing with my appetite. I landed at 1780 (I originally typed that number as 11780. Ack!!! lol) for the day. A couple of hundred over where I like to end up but certainly not a disaster. I am hoping that puff isn't going to be a factor tomorrow. I need to get on my scale. It's been two weeks and it is lonely without me.

Ha!

I got all of my laundry done. I don't mind doing laundry all that much. I have a system that works very nicely and makes pretty short work of it. Not counting the time that the machines have to run. I wish that we wore a lof of clothes that require ironing. I love to iron. Yes, I know... I am certifiably weird. lol My least favourite task is washing dishes. I will scrub my toilet and tub/shower a hundred times before I will willingly wash a sink full of dishes by hand. Thank the heavens for my dishwasher.

Head is still raging. I am praying that it will either calm down or I will stroke out. At this point, either option is looking mighty attractive. Migraines suck. Big green donkey dicks.

I feel like yammering but for the life of me, I can't figure out a damned thing to say. lol So I guess I'll take off, for now.

It's Getting Wild Around Here

Severe thunderstorm watches and warnings, tornado watches and warnings. While we get a lot of crazy thunderstorms in this area, tornadoes and tornado warnings are a fairly rare occurrence around here. We certainly aren't prepared for them, since central Arizona isn't exactly a hotbed of tornado activity.  No one has basements, there are no storm shelters, no warning sirens or anything of that nature. Just The Weather Channel with it's klaxon and red box crawl.

I'm not too concerned about the possibility of a tornado hitting here in Prescott. It is hilly here and tornadoes don't do very well in this type of terrain. If I lived out in the open, flat country in Prescott Valley and up toward Flagstaff, I would be worried.

We are supposed to get storms on and off through the rest of today then it is going to clear out and be sunny and bright, starting tomorrow morning. I am ready for this weather to clear, now. Much as I love me some crazy weather, it will be nice to be able to get out and walk, again. :D

I am thinking of getting my circular needles out and practicing knitting in the round, again. I don't understand what my malfunction is with that. I can knit just fine, flat but for some reason, trying to knit on DPNs and two circs or Magic Loop is evading me. I just need to practice and keep at it. I should also watch videos at Knitting Help and You Tube. I will conquer this. If it is the last thing I do. lol

I also need to register my old laptop in a class action lawsuit against NVIDIA. I have a laptop that has one of their video cards and had to have a repair for my puter failing to link up with the Internet then my monitor died. So, I might get a new computer. I am not counting on it, but if I do, sweet. I admit, I would love to have a new HP. This VIAO is okay, but it isn't what I would have chosen. I love, love, loved my old HP lappie.

I need one of these, this morning:

I am off to find moar coffee. And decide between Egg Beaters and oatmeal for brekkie.

Later, gators. :D

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

About Goal Weights and Why I Don't Talk Much About Mine

Simply put, it is overwhelming in the extreme. My ultimate dream goal is about 140 pounds. I think that for me, a woman who is 5'7" tall and has a fairly sturdy bone structure that is a good number to shoot for. This is a dream goal. I might end up not going that far. I just don't know, at this time.

If I start with my weight when I started this blog, 400 and subtract 140, you get 260. That is a huge number. And if I allow myself to dwell on it, I could easily say, "Fuck that noise! I could never, in a thousand lifetimes get there!" and just give up. So, I don't. Dwell on it. I don't think about it, at all, right now. I keep things at manageable levels. I think in fifty pound increments. Right now, all of my attention is focused on getting to and below 300 pounds. I'll deal with the next fifty when I get to that point. And not think about the overall task ahead of me.

Does it make me a chicken, playing these little head games with myself? Does it somehow show a lack of character, fortitude when I refuse to think about my goals in the whole and break it into very small pieces and focus on one small piece at a time?

Or is it like eating off a salad plate? A helpful little fool the eye trick to help your eyes "trick" your brain and your stomach into thinking that they got more than they really did?

For those of you who are losing or have lost a very large amount of weight, did you break it down? Did you trick your mind? Or, did you say, "I have umpty-ump number of pounds to lose and I am going to look at it this way and just power through. I am Woman/Man hear me roar!" And how do/did you feel about your choice?

It is another cloudy, stormy day. Storm after storm rolled through and thunder boomed and lightening crackled all night long. A lot of rain fell, as well. As I was getting up this morning, another big storm began and it banged and crashed and rained for a couple of hours. Then it cleared out for much of the day but the clouds are rolling back on in. Methinks we are in for another big blow. I like the storms and we need the rain, desperately so bring it on! :D

My head is really bad. I feel as if the right side is about to swell up, collapse and blow out like Mt. Saint Helens. It got so bad yesterday I broke down and took an Aleve to take a little of the edge off and I am paying for the small amount of temporary relief I got with a nasty rebound, today. Oh well. As long as the stabbing doesn't start...

I am going to bake chicken in the oven, make rice in chicken broth and toss a salad for dinner, tonight. Om, nom, nom, nom.

Monday, October 4, 2010

Howz About a Thunderstorm?

Good Monday evening, my little chickadees.

I am in thunderstorm heaven, right now. Dark, low clouds, gusting winds, thunder, lightening and lots of rain. Mama like. :D

Would you all like to see my thunderstorm? I made a few little videos of the storm. My little digital camera can do one minute silent videos, so I did a few. My shooting sucks, I am warning you, right now. And the picture quality isn't top notch. But I think I captured a little of an Arizona thunderstorm.

video

video

In other bloggy type news... Not too much going on. I cleaned the house like a maniac, yesterday so I had an easy day, today. Which is nice, considering the fact that my head is up to a 3.5. Urgh! Food is right on track. But I need to crack down on my sodium intake, again. I am not expelling puff as I should be. *sigh*

I slept terribly, last night. I had seriously weird dreams and woke exhausted. I have been dragging ass all day and am so ready for bedtime.

I am enjoying this rain and cool air. Now, it is beginning to feel a little like Autumn. Oh! In my first video, did you see that some of the leaves are beginning to change?

Guess I am not going walking, tonight. lol

Sunday, October 3, 2010

Day of Rest, My Ass

Sunday. Day of rest. A day to sleep in, have a delicious, leisurely brekkie, read the Sunday paper, watch random TV and just veg to your little heart's content. Riiiight...

More like get up, bolt two cups of coffee and an eggy wrap, then jump right in to hard core housework. We got a lot done. this morning and the house is sparkling and fresh and I am tired. Happily, Husband is a helper and didn't just sit on his ass while I busted mine. When he is home, whether it is his day off or after or even before work, he is perfectly happy to help out and will work just as hard around here as I do. I honestly don't understand the attitudes of men who believe that since they work outside the home they are entitled to come home, demand to be spoiled and waited on yet refuse to help with their children and the housework. They live in the house, they mess it up, they helped create the children. They can damned well pay attention and help care for the children and with the housework, too.

Sorry, just a hot button issue for me. Housewives and stay at home moms work damned hard and we also deserve down time, to have someone step in and help pick up the slack and give us a breather and a chance to decompress, too. Homemaking, done right isn't sitting around, eating bon-bons and watching soaps, all day. And dealing with children is a 24/7 job. And if any of those children have any kind of special needs, multiply the difficulty rating by a factor of at least a thousand. And you can see how a stay home wife/mom needs help, not even more work.

Okay, shutting up, before I really go off on a rant and head out on a county wide tour to slap the living shit out of every husband/father who thinks that he "deserves" to relax while everyone is in frantic movement, around him.

My frakking head is in the midst of a Cat 3 blow. My head has really been raging, lately. The changes in air pressure, the additional allergens in the air, stress are all playing their parts to trigger some viscous migraines.  I knew I was in for it again, today since I started haloing, late last night. I got up to pee about three in the morning and had all kinds of lovely flashing dots in front of my eyes. Bleargh!

Food is going well, today. I am trying to decide what to do for lunch... I have several good options open to me. Maybe Albacore tuna salad ona  bed of lettuce with some salad spritzer. Marley would love it if I had tuna for lunch... lol

Okay, I have to pee and go get me some chow.

I used my last precious sample of Biolage Conditioning Balm when I shampooed my hair, this morning. I really need to get a big tub of that stuff. My hair like it. A lot. It is so. soft.

Okay, now I am outie. Later, dudes. :D

Saturday, October 2, 2010

Caturday

Yes, I have to use that title at least one time per month. Get over it. lol

Another lovely day of humidity and air conditioning. We had some thunder earlier and a little rain on and off. It is almost as if the Monsoon is back. Is it July or October?

Laundry day, today. Four loads. Fun stuff.

Other than that, not a shit load of anything going on, around here. I am bored and cranky. But I am on track, too so that, at least is good.

Okay, I just about broke my keyboard backspacing to correct a typo. Guess it is time to wrap this up before I break my puter.

Geeze, I'm bitchy, today.

Friday, October 1, 2010

Happy October :D

Thus begins a new month.

I am beginning to see hints of the first leaves beginning to turn. Pumpkins are showing up in stores and the isles are packed with bags of candy and costumes. My Fall decorations are up and my Hallowe'en decorations will be going up, pretty soon.

Yesterday was a wash as far as food went. If anyone brings Lay's Chili and Lime chips in this house, again they die. Slowly. Painfully. A third of a bag of those suckers went down my throat. Blech! It was my choice... I am taking responsibility. No one held a gun to my head. But, the fact that they were in the house wasn't my fault. And I have made it clear to my family that there can be no more. Because I obviously can't handle their presence in my home, right now.

So, new month, new day. And I have to be careful because I am logging more higher calorie days than is helpful to me. Why am I sliding? Am I feeling complaisant? Is my run clock sounding, again? I am obviously struggling against something, deep in this head of mine. I need to figure it out. Fast and stay on track. I have no desire to derail myself. I need to refresh my mojo. Remind myself what it is I am doing, here. And what I really want to accomplish.

I wish this were all as easy as the assholes who say "Just put the sandwich down!" seem to think it is. Wouldn't that be nice? lol

With fresh purpose, go forward.