Fucking Gallbladder!

My friends... Your comments, today. I read them over and over and I want to cry, every time. They fill me.

We went out to the lake today to walk. The trails that got all soggy in the last storm are dry and good to go and we walked our usual two miles on Normal Trail. Before we left, I installed Pandora on my phone, grabbed my ass sucking earbuds and off I went. The music was great. I love having it in my ears as I walk. I walked faster, with a longer stride and didn't think about distance or time. I just lost myself in rhythm and moved out. As I approached the tail of the trail, Coldplay was Talk ing in my ear and I just started to run. I couldn't go far or long, but I did go longer and farther than I ever have before. And I went a little faster, with a longer stride and a little bounce in my step. Damn! It was fun! I pushed myself a little, then naturally dropped back to a walk. As I continued to walk, I felt great and I also felt sad. I wanted to just run and run and run.

I never thought I would feel like that. I think I have had a tiny taste of how it feels to be a runner. And I would like more, please.

One day. I must be patient. I must do what I can. A little here, a little there and one day, maybe I will be able to run a few miles at a time. That would be so freaking amazing. To run a 5K one day...

But no more running for me until after I have this fucking gallbladder out. As I was walking back, after turning at the end of the trail the pain hit me hard, in my right side. I tried to ignore it, stretch a little and keep going. That usually works for me but not today. Today it brought me to a dead stop. I dug my hand in hard under my ribcage and just stood there, controlling my breathing and closed my eyes, willing it to just calmdowncalmdowncalmdown. It did, eventually and I was able to finish my walk strong.

I want to get below 250 and get that fucking thing out. The faster, the better. I am over this bullshit. The almost constant low-grade in the background nausea, the pain... Enough, allfrakkingready! Blech!

Say, does anyone have an Android powered smartphone with Pandora on it? I think I turned it off by backing up and going back to home... But I wasn't certain. When I got home, I felt so doubtful about it that I uninstalled Pandora. I am not worried about data usage, I have unlimited data. But Pandora is a battery sucking vampire and I didn't want it running in the background, constantly draining my battery or possibly interfering with other functions. So... My question is, is backing up and going to Home enough to get out of Pandora when you have it playing on your phone? I didn't see a spot to touch to turn it off. I know... I am pathetic and so tech stupid, it isn't funny! lol

Freedom by George Michael is a fabulous walk song. As is Talk by Coldplay. Ordinary World by Duran Duran. Here I Go, Again by Whitesnake... (shut up! I know that you listen to shit I could laugh at you about, too... ;))

Okay, I am now hungry and ready for a little din-din. Don't know what I am going to have. Hmmm...