Saturday, October 9, 2010


Hello darlings. I hope that your weekend is getting off to a fine start, that your skies are blue, your breezes soft and you are on track, still in your minds, happy in your hearts.

Life is nuts. And not so much, all at the same time. I didn't post yesterday. I took a day long vacation from my head. Sometimes I need to do that. Get out of my head and pretend that it isn't here. I feel a little refreshed, today and ready to be "here" again. I think I was also in avoidance of the fact that my eating has been pretty much crap over the last two days. I spout about not letting the number on the scale bother me then I let it get inside my brain, wiggle in there, drive me crazy and I react badly.  lash out at myself, punish myself for not getting the job done in the best and worst way I know how.

I didn't binge. I suppose that is to be commended. Maybe? But I did go into the 2500 calorie range for two days in a row. *sigh* That shouldn't make me gain weight but it certainly isn't beneficial to me or my efforts.

I am back on track, physically and more importantly, mentally today.

My... What a bunch of self absorbed whining. lol

Anyhoozle, it is a gorgeous day, today. Sunny and it is supposed to warm up very nicely.It is supposed to be about 90 down in the Valley, today. It would be so much fun to go spend a day down there, drive around, shop, hang out. I need a day out, some time away. Some fun.

Okay, I am back. It is now night. Had a sort of busy day. And am anticipating an even busier one, tomorrow. Which is fine. I keep busy, I don't sit and think about stuffing my fat, self indulgent face.

I made chicken for dinner, I grilled three and baked three. Yes, Husband wants his baked with the Shak and Bake shit and it was warm, today which meant a hot, hot house. Blech! Why can't Mr. Picky Butt just eat what the rest of us are eating? Gah! I made baked potatoes and a big, fresh green salad. I guess the boyzies were hungry, between the two of them they killed off four big pieces of chicken. I had one and there was one left to put away for a future meal. Man, the way we go through chicken, I should buy stock in a chicken farm, or something. lol

So, after the last two not so stellar days, I am ending up very nicely on track. I feel better and better about myself and what I am doing. So that is positive. :D

I have enough calories saved back for a little swettie. Meesathinkin' a dark chocolate sugar free pudding. Jello makes gooood dark chocolate sugar free pudding. 60 calories of smooth, creamy heaven in a little cup. I love dark chocolate. With some kind of stupid passion.

Aw, fuck! The Yankees just made it into the ALCS, I am so sick of seeing that team in the playoffs every. frakking. year. And if I have to hear Frank Sinatra sing New York, New York one more time...


It is supposed to be a lovely day, tomorrow. In the seventies and sunny. Should be a nice day to get out of this house, get some shopping done.

I am soooo tired of this current headache. This is over a week, now. I am ready for it to go bye-bye and have a little break before the next one comes on in.

Can I just say how much I love the fact that Blogger saves posts I back out of? I got to just finish the one I started earlier, rather than plow through a whole new entry. :D


  1. I also like the way blogger saves posts, it makes is so much easier if you have to go and do something. Hope you have a great weekend..

  2. I've been keeping up, but your system here doesn't let me comment often. I'm so proud of your weight loss success. OMG, you work so hard. The only thing that's been upsetting me lately is how down on yourself you've been. It's a bad sign. You ate 2500. That's not gaining weight; that's a holding pattern, and not a binge. Don't get mean to yourself or you risk harm. But you know all that.

    I still love when you write and your writing itself. I miss you at LHC, but at least I can enjoy your work here. You're more open--freer--here. It's wonderful. You're at your best when you speak from the heart.

    The entry above--dh's farting/shitting--o, woman. You are way too much! I thought I'D fart from hysterical laughter. :~)

  3. Hi Hope! I haven't left LHC. I am just on a little hiatus. I miss the fun and conversation there and will likely return someday soon. But I think that the bulk of my personal blogging will stay here. We'll see.

    I am not really all that down on myself. Truly. I do beat myself up a bit, call myself a few names but the self loathing thing is lightening up. A lot. And I am learning to forgive myself, not stay mad and do harmful things. So. Progress of a sort.

    I am so glad that you are still coming by and reading. Blogger can be fussy, sometimes. I don't understand why... lol

    Take care. <3

  4. Debbie, that was precisely what happened. I stepped away for what I thought was a few minutes and hours later, finally came back. lol

    Thank you for your kind words and I hope that you are having a fab weekend. :D

  5. Sorry my Twins couldn't knock off the Yankees! Happens pretty much every time they meet in the playoffs. Just roll over and play dead.

  6. I agree about the Yankees. It's all about the Yankees, it seems.

    Erika, I think you're doing great. Headache for a week? I used to have them, and I learned a few things that helped mine. Get plenty of sleep. Watch the caffeine and chocolate. Also the nitrates and msg in packaged and restaurant food, and meats like bacon. Also, the weather triggered mine. Then I went through menopause and (for the most part) they disappeared. Cycle? Probably.

    I hope you feel better and can get out and shop a little.

  7. Well, I think it's right nice to take a vacation from your head once in a while. I'm waaaay overdue. Have any tips?

    You're back on track. You didn't binge. Yes, you are to be commended. And this blog is about your path to weight loss, so discussing these things doesn't make you self-absorbed, woman!

    Boo on the Yankees from me too. :(

    Hi up there, Hope!


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