Monday, August 9, 2010

Return of the Puff Monster

The Puff Monster sucks.

I hate the Puff Monster.

I am trying to kill the Puff Monster.

With pretzels?

Seriously? WTF was I thinking? Salty pretzels don't banish the bloaty bloat bloat. They kind of make it happen. Pretzels are Puff Monster food. I didn't touch pretzels for over a week and no puff. Eat a small bowl of pretzel sticks and I am sucking down waaaay too much water to make me happy, keeping my feet up and watching my stupid ankles and feet slowly, steadily expand.


Of course.

I can't wait to get on my scale, on Thursday, if this keeps up.

Okay, somebody call the Waaahmbulance. I feel a serious pity party coming on. "Whiny, complaining biotch, party of one, your table is ready!"

I have been feeling increasing rumblings from my old self. My old, confident, fearless, outspoken self. She is beginning to chip away at the thick wall of reinforced concrete that has held her back for so very long. Sometimes, Former/Future Me overtakes Current Me and the most astonishing things happen for a brief, shining moment. Then I manage to stuff her back behind her wall. I need her to remain quiet for a while longer. I need to remain Current Me; keep the peace, keep everything on an even keel. I need time. I need to prep for her arrival. Because when I do cut that bitch loose, all hell is going to erupt everywhere and I will need to be fully her to deal with it.

And I have to tell ya... Hell or not, I am looking forward to the fireworks. I think it is going to be fun. It will certainly be entertaining.

Have you entered my CSN Stores sponsored $40.00 gift certificate giveaway, yet? If not, please click the link, travel to my giveaway post and enter in comments. The giveaway is open to public followers in the US and Canada.

Okay... That is about all I have to yap about, at the moment. I have thoughts swirling but can't seem to make them come together and flow through my fingertips to my keyboard. I suck so hard at writing. lol


  1. Glad to hear the old/future you is trying to break through. Can't wait to meet her :)

  2. You do not suck at writing...not at all. It feels like you are on the cusp of a huge internal awakening and I too, am excited for the fireworks.

  3. mmmm....let er rip. I love pretzels.
    Drink a ton of water and eat no sodium and you should be right as rain by thursday. lol

  4. Im with drazil!!

    and Im now sitting here waiting for the **fireworks 'splosion**


  5. Gotta start being nicer to yourself, Erika! Both with what you feed your body in words and food.

    I hope you unpuff soon. That is completely uncomfortable, and you KNOW how I feel about discomfort (it's bad - avoid it at all costs)!

  6. I have the feeling that I'll like the old self very much--maybe even better than the current self, which is considerable.

    Ugh. The puff monster.

  7. Hate.Puff.Monster!! He hangs around me much too often. A new/old you just waiting to bust out......yes, could be very interesting/entertaining!

  8. Hi, I have just a few minutes to return e-mails and visit those who stopped by my blog yesterday, but I wanted to be sure to thank you for your comment regarding smoking on my blog yesterday.

    I'm so happy that you made the choice to quit all those years ago. I assure you, you have no idea how many people could be affected if you were to become ill because of this. You may have saved your family and friends from many years of suffering. Quitting is a HUGE accomplishment. Hugs,


  9. Awaiting the fireworks. And I can't wait to meet this new person. I think I'm going to like her a lot!


Talk to me! :D I love comments, enjoy discussion and debate. I wear my big girl panties and welcome constructive criticism. I do not accept anonymous comments. Not because I can't take the heat. I can. It is because I believe that if you are going to say it, you need to have the balls to put a name to it.

Please do not spam my comments. If you would like for me to check out your blog, if you follow me/have me on your blogroll and would like me to follow you/add you to my blogroll, please shoot me an e-mail with your blog URL. I will come visit :). Same goes if you are a company or PR. Please shoot me an e-mail. You can find my address in the contact tab at the top of my blog page. Thank you. :D